You said you loved me. So let me go and set me free. I long to explore the vast expanse of Australia’s farms, play with the goats and kangaroos again. I love to explore the bustling streets of China and feel its cool breeze – a scent of freedom – on my skin. Whenever I listen to Dee Kosh on Power 98 FM, I feel like all my troubles have been washed away – all the hurt and sadness. I feel like I am not someone suffering from mental health issues anymore. Freedom: it breathes life into every prisoner’s mind. It holds you captive and spellbound.
“What do a Gucci bag and a handsome lad have in common?”
“We all drool over them when we know we can’t get them. But once we do, we are never satisfied.”
You cornered me, wanted to hold me captive. I was like a wild animal stuck in a cage with nowhere to go. Your emotions flooded over me like an avalanche, and I was drowning inside. I was smothered by your love- our selfish love. It was like someone turned on the radio from zero to one hundred. The intensity and passion of your love kept burning like coals on fire until a gust of wind extinguished it- poof. It was gone just like that.
Rusty strings, to be replaced.
A broken heart, to be thrown away.
Adulting is hard. When I was a kid, I wanted to grow up fast, and travel around the world. Unbridled freedom to explore places of interest and be unconstrained by boundaries. I wanted to wear heavy makeup and revealing clothes, like the valley girls in New York – have womanly curves which would make any boy blush. But now, at 23, I am filled with misguided notions about what adult life would be. It is more trouble than it’s worth, and it’s not all fun and games. As I look back, I can only reminiscence about my childhood.